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the slickywickywickest there is
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Location: Newcastle
Born: 16 September 2014
weeb shit
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Awards & Championships: admin 2011-2014
Themes: a noncommittal wiggly hand gesture with a vague “enhhh” noise
Appeared In: the skullgirls credits
the indivisible credits
Joined: 7-March 15
Status: (Offline)
Last Seen: Jun 23 2017, 04:21 PM
Local Time: Jun 24 2017, 12:10 AM
752 posts (0.9 per day)
( 4.41% of total forum posts )
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AES Founder

My Content
Jun 18 2017, 04:03 AM
Hi I got inspired by Girly to do this myself. I think I've got way too many characters and I love every single one of my babies but I think I'd definitely be able to invest in the website more if I finally cut back and focused on a few. It's what I did anyway tbh, hence how Alan ended up Alan, but it was at the cost of a lot of guys just not getting to do anything and I think I've got a couple of really good ideas hidden within the shitposts depths of my signature and I'd not like to see a lot of them go.

I'm willing to further explain characters and details for anybody who may want them, such as themes, specific statlines, finishers I had, any pictures I can find, fed appearance histories, etc. if you're on the fence and want to know more about your potential acquisition but please don't that's work and i'm terrible with work

Not first come first served, deciding what I wanna do in a week when I see who wants want and stuff and giving myself enough time to change my mind on some guys.

Fedheads can absolutely talk to me on discord or over PM about the characters that I have in their feds that I'm maybe giving away and we can have a discussion and figure out what's going on and what to do, I will quickly say now I don't think they should be written off because they're going to a different handler though, if anything they'll make the characters better for you to work with and I don't mind it still taking up my spot in your fed so don't worry about that; and if nobody claims them then I'm obviously not giving up on them either I'll just need to come up with new ideas to make it worth it for you so I might need to communicate with you about stuff. Like I said I wouldn't worry about it though, if anything I'm improving your fed by removing an inactive member but keeping the incredible, perfect cinnamon roll that I signed up.

Absolutely off the table:
Spoiler (Show/Hide)
  • Alan Emmerich Stevenson
  • Albert Del Tyneside
  • Conga (and Autumn Breeze)
  • Daoloth, VOM and The Albanos
  • Enyo Atheyos
  • Jock Miller
  • Kotodel
  • Mango Mask
  • Percy Belfast
  • Puzzle Bobble (Devin/Violeta)
  • Trippys (~Funky~, James, Rudo, 4, ETV)
  • World Domination Squad (Majik/Frogger/BAHAMUT)
  • characters that I need for bits (SUPAH DRAGIN, Howie Dewitt, Bruce Goodman, Manfred Sunn, Hubert Tents)
Not even fully mine but still in the sig so off the table also:
  • AES Cops
  • Confine
  • Jedward
  • Suddenly, Mark Henry
Pretty sure I'm keeping but you can shoot your shot, who knows:
  • 3 Fruit Basket - I'd definitely be keeping Mango Mask as said before, but if people wanted to make it a trio and work together in the roles of Lemon Key Face and Ginger Mahal I'd be way down. I love them though and wouldn't trust just anybody with these shitposts.
  • Cap'n D. Bonney - My pirate lass from Dangan RPG. Want to put her somewhere. Not fully sure how to actually ever translate her into e-wrestling though, would just like it to happen. Would only really trust somebody who was fromt hat session with her though.
  • GIGA DARKFLAME BRITAIN - Just got him back from Girly, super evil swearlord who used to represent Great Britain as a luchador until I realised I had no idea how to promo that. There was a bit of a mess that followed. I think I'm keeping them now since Francis took the other half, but if somebody's interested in teaming with Francis and he approves then
  • RUIN - Only reason I'd really want this is so I wouldn't be managing my own guy and I'm definitely not giving up ETV or unpairing the two because I think they work well together. This is probably not happening. But who knows. We'll see. You wouldn't actually have to do much here either but you'd get to work with me and Tiffy (and maybe Sean, Jolene/ETV future pending)
Definitely available:
  • Ashley ReMango - Mango Mask's rich, distant cousin who everybody loves. Inherited his fortune from Darkness Mango and now spends his day doing everything he loves: hanging out with all his friends and all of their friends and all of THEIR friends, sharing his endless fortune to those less fortunate, sailing on his various boats and yachts that he owns, and wrestling. Obviously. Wrestling website.
  • Dickie Creamens - Hired after his appearance in the AES Porn Parody where it turns out he has a knack for this business, along with various other things that probably don't translate well into wrestling. He keeps getting himself in sticky situations, if you know what I'm saying. Would probably star in a poor little white guy.
  • Eiffel 65 Patterson - The world's BIGGEST europop fan (in terms of size, he's probably at least in the top 10 in terms of europop though). Me and Matt had the best idea ever of a stable of people named after europop groups with last names but that never happened and so Patterson's just chilling around in the abyss doing nothing.
  • The Figure Fours - Barbershop Quartet consisting of Ricky, Micky, Dickie and Steve. I did this with Nate and Julio but Julio is never on the site because he's busy with real life things and Nate probably stopped giving a shit the second we posted the signups so yolo. We had them as a trio (the joke was the fourth one was dead but they carried on in spirit). This idea is fucking great and if nobody claims them I'm doing the one man revival myself. Also this is their theme.
  • Gorgeous Manhassen - The Ultramodel. The idea is that there's an agency who books all his appearances and tells him the contracts to sign, all he has to do is "stay beautiful", obviously one of the things the agency booked him into was AES because this is AES. Possibly has a hidden side to him where he may or may not be harming others in the ring and using their blood to keep his skin looking beautiful. Thought there was a lot that could have been done here. I'm not the man to do it.
  • Joseph Cross - Banned from several different MMA feds after a violent streak and missing public appearances, got into wrestling via shitty promoters trying to capitalise on the notoriety that he's gained through this. Self proclaimed baddest man on the planet and has never lost a fight in AES. Has also never had a fight in AES, but y'know just roll with it. Aims to cross you out. Permanently. Oh, I should probably note that if you get Cross you'll also probably get managed by Adonis, so you should get on this.
  • KIMRAD THE DESTROYER - The spirit of the world's most evil Kaiju monster spirit, times seven, in a 5'2 134lb body. Wishes to eat the heart of the world, destroying it and making him the most powerful being in the entire galaxy. Thinks that touring the AES Galaxy will help him find it easier. If you've ever watched classic CHIKARA, imagine Hydra. This guy is Hydra.
  • Muskel - Muskel is a 6'11, 365lbs of pure muscle giant of a man with a heart of gold and would never harm a fly, which makes him becoming a wrestler and odd choice but the idea was he'd use moves that wouldn't really try to truly hurt his opponents and moreso use his size and strength to keep them down. For example, he'd use a bear hug because it's a submission difficult to break from a man that size leaving them with no choice but to tap out, but it's not one that'll do any long term damage to their careers. Signed him up twice and both feds died before show one.
  • Oliver Dudley Poole - Silent movie star with silent movie promos, this was actually my first attempt at a non-Trippy character on the site and he didn't work out at all in all honesty because I didn't connect with him, but with more and more classic styled wrestlers killing it in the world such as Simon Gotch having a great indy run for some reason or another I'm sure somebody could find something to do with this.
  • Taz Fieri - It's Taz but it's also Guy Fieri.
  • Ugg - Caveman. Was from a future fed. Like, distant future. Only notable aspect of him from that was that his finisher was the Unga Bunga David Otunga and the end result was it was just gonna end up being a Trippy frozen in a block of ice and not actually a proper caveman and he was speaking what would have been perfect english now but entirely primitive 1000 years from now. But y'know ignore that bit. This man is a caveman. Cavemen? They rule. Make a current day caveman.
  • Valrus Plotkiller - Based spoilerman. Will ruin your day and the ending of that old movie from about 30 years ago. Basically I imagine him to be right in the middle of the crossroads of that dick in your old class who won't stop talking about all the new events and happenings loudly so you end up overhearing everything, and the Day Ruiner Ryan Braddock because he's actually going out of his way to do that. I'd like to request if you do get him then please don't uh, actually ruin anything for people. Don't even make shit up about new movies, stick to fake in universe movies or at the very least movies from like the 80s.
  • Wrestlerangers - Wrestling power rangers. Not to be confused with the sentais and the actual good versions of these characters the Starranjehs, these guys are straight up from your saturday morning fox kids cartoon block (despite power rangers being live action). There's like a million wrestle rangers across a million members of every single fucking colour but literally nobody gives a shit because mine was red, they'll never be using theirs again, this is probably for the concept.
  • Every other shitpost and unimportant character you could imagine from my signature that I haven't written about*
* - I'll probably still steal LOTUSFED'3D characters when needed though obv
Jun 4 2017, 10:09 PM
Big Boy Gladwin! You utter nincompoop! You absolute bit of bumfluff! How dare you do this to me?? Just last update, I said the following!

Remember, your participation is secret until you're announced! This is to create a wonderful surprise for everyone for when you're announced! And yet, I've already seen two people forget about this one important rule that I wanted to have set in stone, but it's been a year so I can understand people needing their memory refreshed! I will allow everybody relatively off the hook for now, but please know that I'm not going to reach three strikes! Any further infractions of this rule will cause you to forfeit your spot in the tournament! Everybody else: Please pretend to be shocked when said people are announced!

And yet, there I am, watching the newest episode of Primetime like all of the cool kids, watching the shocks and the swerves and the excellent wrestling matches, and this video greets me:

Why??? Why did you think this was a good idea??? Did you not listen to a single word that I said??? I've repeated this several several times and you go and make a gosh darn advertisement to air during federations! Well, Vincenzo Oswaldo Maciarello is a man of his word! Big Boy Gladwin, you are hereby kicked out of the King of Los Angel-AES tournament! You utter buffoon! Do not show up to KOLA weekend! I've already found a replacement! I hate you!

Love, VOM.
Jun 2 2017, 02:24 PM

May 26 2017, 02:47 PM
Wow! I was not expecting my beautiful and wonderful tournament to be filled in such quick fashion. You all have done the world proud and most importantly, you have done me proud. I am wiping away tears with $100 bills out of joy and will donate those tear-clad notes to a charity of my choosing, you've all touched my heart with your wonderfulness. Because of your enthusiasm, I now have a tournament that is both wonderful and ready to go whenever. But were going to wait four months anyway to ensure that the proper preparation is done and everything is perfect.

Anyway, not to dally any further. I have some news for you all that I'd like to give to you all. A whole bunch of it in fact, and it's all rather important so please read all of it.

Remember, your participation is secret until you're announced! This is to create a wonderful surprise for everyone for when you're announced! And yet, I've already seen two people forget about this one important rule that I wanted to have set in stone, but it's been a year so I can understand people needing their memory refreshed! I will allow everybody relatively off the hook for now, but please know that I'm not going to reach three strikes! Any further infractions of this rule will cause you to forfeit your spot in the tournament! Everybody else: Please pretend to be shocked when said people are announced!

Now, onto the exciting but also dreadful (but also beautiful) news.

The tournament, in your excitement and love, has gotten overbooked! We're approximately nine people over what we want. And so, I have personally picked out 18 people who were either very late to sign up or I feel needs to prove themselves in order to get into the tournament, to fight for their right to be IN the tournament. It'll be simple. 9 matches. Fight for your right to be in the competition. You only have one chance, because I do not believe in losers brackets. Failure should never be rewarded, especially with stakes as high as this! You get told your opponent, you come to my show in July, and you win your way into my competition. Then you can win all the wonderful prizes that are up for grabs for this years winner!

So yes, to clarify:

Coming this July, a special one-off show featuring 18 of the hungriest wrestlers in the world today fighting for a spot in my tournament!

But who will be those 18? And who will be the other 23 wrestlers involved in the tournament?
Well, I have a great answer to that one: be sure to keep your eyes on the OFFICIAL Armbar Error Society twitter page throughout the month of June. Two weekly announcements: Every Friday will confirm four people who will take part in the tournament, while Saturdays will announce two qualifier matches! The sole exception to this rule will be the final Friday of June (30th), which to balance out all the numbers correctly will get 3 tournament announcements and the final qualifying match.

So to clarify, here's the schedule:
June 2nd: 1-2-3-4
June 3rd: 2 Qualifying Matches Revealed
June 9th: 5-6-7-8
June 10th: 2 Qualifying Matches Revealed
June 16th: 9-10-11-12
June 17th: 2 Qualifying Matches Revealed
June 23rd: 13-14-15-16
June 24th: 2 Qualifying Matches Revealed
June 30th: 17-18-19 + Qualifying Match Revealed
July, sometime: Vincenzo Oswaldo Maciarello Presents: KOLA Qualifying Rounds

Wonderful! What a wonderful time to be alive! What a wonderful tournament! But some of you may have noticed something here. 19+9 is 28!! What about the other 4? Well... let's just say I have something special planned for them. I've been on the ol' dog and bone to a friend of mine for the past month now trying to convince him to take part. I'm sure negotiations are going smoothly. I'm a good negotiator. And, a good man.

Arrivederci, frogs! See you all soon! Hugs and kisses!
~ Vincenzo Oswaldo Maciarello


Me and or Sam have already told the people who are going to not qualify for the tournament that they're definitely not qualifying for the tournament. Everybody involved has agreed and now has plans for other things in the weekend so don't worry about them. If we haven't spoken to you about that sort of stuff then obviously you don't need to worry if your name pops up in a qualifying match. All it means is you're helping to explain the canon of why certain characters aren't in the tournament and your character is getting a free win because we love them. Just uh. Don't spoil that you're in or out for anybody else. Keep the mystery alive.
Mar 16 2017, 07:25 PM
Did I say I'd post them Sunday the 12th of March? Haha I meant RIGHT NOW

Still waiting on some team names but there's still plenty of time so yolo
Last Visitors

Jun 18 2017, 08:01 AM

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Jun 11 2017, 09:03 AM
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AES Main skin made by Ross Hitchman with additional help from Matt The Doctor, El Beardy and Teezy.